Tough Knooky

Another couple from Rhode Island, Art and Laura Broudoir met us in town to make the rounds. We were only allowed two beers per bar. There were many bars in Memphis and we must have hit them all. The girls were more sober than Art and Me. Don't ask me why. Gerry and Laura decided that Art was the most unsteady, therefor he had to eat. Ha, what the hell. Sure he'd eat. We picked a Ptomaine Tavern near the river front. It was run by a very disagreeable little Jewish man. We had been there before and he thought all sailors were crude, troublesome trash.

Well, we were out to prove him right.

Art ordered a T Bone steak. "We didn't want to eat, we just wanted to watch Art eat". The waitress did not like our type of customer. I said just get the God Damn steak. When the steak arrived, Art asked for a sharper knife. Next he asked for a hack saw.  It was the toughest piece of steak ever. Beside it the hoof would have been more tender.

Art wore false teeth . He took them out and began to pound upon the steak. The Jew boy said stop I'll give you another one.

The Chef looking out of the kitchen was enjoying the whole show. After all he didn't buy the meat, his boss did. I asked the waitress for a five foot piece of string. She turned on her heel and walked away. I next went to the laughing chef who then gave me the string and watched as we tied the string to the steak.  We named the steak Fido and placed it on the floor. Everyone who came in was asked to walk around it.

The tavern was glad to finally see us leave, but the steak followed us on the string.  We intended to walk up the main street of Memphis towing the steak.  The girls were too embarrassed to be seen with us, so they gave us an option -  the girls or the steak. We chose the girls.  

Art twirled the steak around on the string and let it fly up an ally. If it didn't kill someone, then a dog probably broke its teeth.

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